Said it was coming.

And as I’ve been told i write to much by some and MQ demands i write in this more (so you better read it all Kristina, i wont be happy otherwise.) i figured i’d give you the best of both worlds:




Oh dear god where am i supposed to start? I can’t even decide there is so much i could talk about and point out just how awesome it all is but you can’t even begin to realize why without playing it yourself. If you like first person shooters and i mean the old FPS’ers, the ones that had campaigns over 10 hours, the ones that didn’t need multiplayer to be good the ones that you could play through 10+ times and not get bored then you’ll love bioshock.

Everything about it is so perfect set in the 1960s but has futuristic elements thrown in, you can upgrade your weapons and give them this futuristic almost alien like look to them, not only can you upgrade them every gun has several different types of ammo for different types of enemy,  the sheer amount of plasmids (think magical spells but instead it’s more of a toxin he injects into his arm.) gives you so much flexiblity.

See a robot/security camera or turret? Well, you’d want Anti-Armour ammo to take those down. Or perhaps you’d prefer to just fire out an electric bolt and disable it? Maybe freeze it or snap your fingers and set it on fire. Hell perhaps if you’re against the right turret you’d like to stop the grenade it’s fired at you in the air using telekinesis and throw it right back?

Maybe you’d prefer to hack it and get it on your side? Hack it just so you can destroy it maybe? Hey MAYBE you see another enemy near by and you’d prefer the turret/camera took note of him so you fire off a plasmid at him that gets the cameras/turrets eye let the two enemys cancel each other out - pit them against each other and pick off the weakened winner maybe.

That’s the sheer amount of options you get throughout and i didn’t even list them all.  Imagine that throughout the entire game, each enemy having a ton of possible options to beat and yet somehow it all seems so balanced, nothing is over powered. You don’t find yourself sticking to one type of gun/ammo or power, you use them all and mix them all up.

The atmosphere is fantastic, the music that might be playing on a juke box, hearing a whale as you’re walking down a glass corridor with the ocean all around you seeing fish swim by. And then there’s the voice acting, which is some of the best I’ve seen. Fantastic believable voice acting finishes it off and really sucks you into the game world.  At one point there was a set up and the certain character guiding me was franticly screaming at me in a panic, that same certain character got extremely pissed off and upset - quiet rightfully and started screaming down the voice communication box at me and demanding vengeance and while I’m ashamed to admit it, i was slightly pissed off over what had happend myself. XD

And that’s not something a game has managed to do for years and years. It’s really brought back the old FPS’ers that didn’t need multiplayer to be great that stood on there own with a long, fun campaign and fantastic story line. And that’s what bioshock is greatest for, it’s story. It’s rare to find a FPS that even has a story anymore and it’s a shame because it turns them into something amazing and Bioshocks is one of the best around. There’s so many twists, turns and unexpected moments. I rarely find a story in a game that i didn’t already predict, a moment that i didn’t see coming. But in this? Well, for those that played it lets just say:

“Would you so ******.”

NEVER SAW THAT COMING DID YOU? Yes i blocked out one word in case those that haven’t got that far catch on, those that have played it know exactly what I’m talking about.
Faanntastic moment.

Not only that but there are several different types of resources, hell i thought i was playing a RTS. You have Money, you have well, i can’t describe it as nothing other than shit that you collect up to invent new items (Yes, you can invent stuff to, ohh so much i can’t even begin on this one.) and then you have something called ADAM. You can gain these things all over the place in different ways but you never get enough that it’s to easy and you never have to little that you get stuck or find yourself frustrated or pissed off.

The most interesting one is ADAM, the only way to get this is to get to Little sisters. A little sister is what looks like a little girl walking around Rapture (the city you’re in) but shes not a little sister. Shes more..well, a fucking psycho if you ask me.  She walks about stabbing dead bodys and sucking out ADAM. ADAM is probably the most important resource, everyone in Rapture is after it and wants it so these little sisters you would presume are pretty big targets or would be if it wasn’t for there best friends The Big Daddys.

Can’t describe them as nothing else other than a big diving suit with a drill. But there  strong and despite there big size damn fast to. Anyone trys to touch a little sister and the big daddy will soon take care of them. And that’s what makes getting ADAM so interesting, the only way to get them is to kill a big daddy and that’s not always an easy task, it’s hard enough to have a risk element and makes you think twice before you do it.

If you manage to kill him you then get presented with an option. You can kill the little sister and take the ADAM or save her but receive less ADAM. More of a moral decision but it’s nice to have the option there.

EVERYTHING about this game is almost perfect, the one critisizem i have is there is a bit to much “fetch these items” tasks, i don’t mind doing a few but it gets a bit old if it’s constantly thrown in there.

The amount of variety is off the fucking chart, the guns, the gun upgrades, the ammo creating, the plasmids, the plasmid upgrades, the toxins,  the toxin upgrades fuck i could go on like this for quiet a while there is so much more. And then the enviroments, see ice? Set it on fire and watch it melt, fire some electricity into the water and fry anyone in there.  Set oil alight and burn everything around you.

SO SO SO MUCH, i just need to stop. This is long enough and i honestly could go on about it all for another 20 pages or so. I guarantee no one has read all of this, rotfl it’s far to long.  XD

But lets be fair, if you’ve played the game please keep any comments spoiler free, I’ve not even completed it yet but I’m fairly close now.


  1. Mr. Pink
    August 26th, 2007 | 7:33 pm

    Never thought it was that good, this is another reason why I should get a 360 :(
    P.S. I wonder how good Halo 3 will be…

  2. oblivionsteven
    August 26th, 2007 | 8:45 pm

    BioShock is … Well, Halo 3 is… I’m torn :(
    BUT, BioShock is 0WN4G3 :P

  3. August 29th, 2007 | 7:53 pm

    If this is Creepy’s Tavern, then why the hell are we talking about video games and not beer??????????

    Little sisters :wub:

  4. August 30th, 2007 | 10:34 pm

    I read the short part the essay part was tl;dr.

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